Kind people, make the best lovers. Be that KIND of lover.
    • Because lube shouldn’t be seen as a 4 letter word, buy their favorite kind and always have some on hand.


    • Surprise them with a fresh set of laundered bedding at the end of the day.


    • Keep a collection of mood music on your play lists, from quiet soothing instrumentals, to a wide variety of tunes whose varying beats might influence how you flirt, to how you make love.


    • What scents does your partner most enjoy? Look for ways to incorporate those into your budget.


    • Place a cup of ice water or something hot to drink next to their night stand right before bedtime.


    • Fluff up their pillows. If they’re a major pillow lover, keep them well stocked. Consider different fabrics if textures play a part in self-soothing moments.


    • Don’t end the day with movies or shows that lend themselves to darker scenes or endings. Aim for something that sends them off with a stronger bent towards happier dreams.


    • Are you able to keep as many electronic on/off type lights from potentially lowering their sleep standards. Experts say those really do keep us from entering truly deep sleep. How about investing in a nice plush or cooling sleep mask?


    • Are the floors clear of things that could be tripped over if someone needs to get up partway into the night?


    • What can you do to reassure the partner who has a history of needing to feel the house is locked up and safe, that your bedroom is all the more a sanctuary?


    • Does leaving your cell phone out in the kitchen or bathroom verses ever in the bedroom send the message it’s all about you two time when you cross into this room? OR on the opposite foot, does having it turned off and placed within sight of them put a stop to any question that past histories might have left them insecure about?


    • Only have photos of you as a couple in your room. Other rooms can be used to celebrate family. Make your bedroom a place set apart to only focus on the two of you.


    • If necessary medical equipment come with operating noises, does your partner need a sound machine or set of comfortable ear plugs made available?


    • Don’t be the one responsible for getting crumbs in the bed. It’s just cruel.


    • Is there a needed service animal whose job it is to stay close? Check out the different bedside attachments that are on the market, so it’s just the two of you actually on the bed.


    • Would reading to your partner at the end of the day bless them? You don’t have to be the strongest oral reader. Sometimes it’s really just the familiar sound of your voice they need. Of course, there’s loads of awesome audio books. And there’s library programs that lend those for free to those with visual impairment and other considerations.


    • Place a big ole piece of art work above your bed that says something special about your relationship.


    • Develop your own personal end of night, make a kinda-big-deal, out of saying goodnight rituals. Never fail to use those last minutes to connect or reconnect at a heart level. No small number of people wish they still had that chance, so value the fact that you do.


    • Save “Make-up-sex,” for the more light hearted oops, type of apologies. Like:

    Running over a toe with your wheelchair

    Eating the pizza and leaving them with a jawbreaker, sawdust level protein bar for lunch

    Butt dialing them earlier in the day

    Not rinsing your dishes

    Passing gas during a transfer