When you date, consider whether or not the following suggestions play a role in adding to the overall success of pulling your date off fluidly:
  • Bathroom needs & comfort factors involved with those needs
  • Ease/options for transfers to additional or different seating
  • Have you remembered your parking permit?
  • Would it be wise to have an “Expect the unexpected” pre-packed planning bag available? (Diabetic aids, ear plugs, disposable Ziploc bags, strong mints, hand sanitizer, wipes, small flashlight, extra or specialized eating utensils, hand-warmers, disposable gloves, pre-loaded MP3, travel sized game…)
  • Do one or both of you have an accurate & available ICE* list on you? (*In Case of Emergency)
  • Do you have enough history on your partner to know if avoiding venues where alcohol is being served would be a kindness or courtesy?
  • Are there air-quality sensitivities that might detract from your outing?
  • Any allergen considerations that need addressing ahead of time?
  • Do benches for brief rest periods need to be available?
  • When you’re making plans to arrive or leave, make sure to pad it with plenty of extra time to relieve pressure on everyone involved, and to ensure arrival times are timed to keep schedules on any activities involved.
  • Make sure both partners feel free to keep their phones turned on and accessible without pressure.
  • Know if your date is capable of coughing on their own (those with no core muscle control like Quadriplegics, cannot as a general practice) so be aware of if, or how, they will need assistance, should that become an issue when food or liquids are being shared.
  • Does having a current med list/schedule on either of you make sense? What about a physician list?
  • Again, when contemplating where to go for the first date, always ask if the other person would prefer to pick a venue they’re already familiar with and comfortable going to, unless you know you need that exact courtesy. It's okay for either party to lean on this as an option if it lowers the stress or anxiety level. Who needs that on top of normal first-date jitters?
  • Focus on fun and getting the privilege of just having time with the one you’re out with. Consider if it’s wisdom or courtesy to fore-go spotlighting disabilities or health related matters on the first date, be that yours or theirs. That discussion is usually reserved for when each one of you is ready to share their story. Maybe it will be an open topic right off the back which your date will dive into. But when left in your corner, be the date that drives the conversation towards what makes them someone you wanted to get to know better.
  • Metal-detector factors.
  • Pre-evaluated & arranged lifts/elevator opportunities if needed.
  • Up-to-date/well-kept ramp.
  • Parking space needs (oversized spots, parking spots that match the transportation side or rear-lift accommodations, easy drop-off.)
  • Spatial needs (pick places where both of you have comfortable freedom to move around.) It’s a kindness to offer the partner with the broader needs the choice of venue to meet, suggesting they choose a place they already know is comfortable for them, which will alleviate any potential stress in this specific area.
  • Background noise levels (focus, distractions, irritations – If any of those are of issue, consider a different venue option, and make it clear, that’s not a problem.)